The Gift of Beauty

For one of my classes I had to watch these two videos,

Dove Evolution--http://youtu.be/iYhCn0jf46U
Beauty Pressure-http://youtu.be/Ei6JvK0W60I,

and write a paper about it and answer these four questions,

1. How did these videos make you feel?
2. What other ways do you think media affects girls/young woman?
3. Do you feel the pressure to be like the models in magazines and billboards?
4. Do you think the opposite gender feels the pressure?

In my paper I did answer all of these questions honestly and personally, but that is besides the point. During class we divided into groups to discuss the videos and the group I was in had a deep discussion about them. Six girls and one guy, we all came to the conclusion that these videos are unrealistic and that they are only trying to sell or advertise one thing. I enjoyed this discussion with this group because it opened my eyes. I personally think that all the guys out there in the world are looking for the model type looking women. As I think that I feel that there is no guy out there for me because I do not meet the 5'11, skinny, suntanned standards that are set. I meet the 5'3, bigger built, baige standards, and I KNOW there is nothing wrong with that. After listening to a guy from his perspective I have hope. A couple of other guys in class agree with the one in my group. They don't like the super skinny girls that have to be photo shopped, they like the girls with natural beauty. After discussing with my group I realized that we are all beautiful in our own ways. I didn't know that Marilyn Monroe was a bigger built woman which makes me feel better about myself. This leads me to my topic of the Gift of Beauty. I know that I am a beautiful young lady that is a Child of God. He sent me here not to worry about my size, or makeup, or hair, or shape, or whatever else there is telling girls they aren't pretty. I don't need other people to think that I am beautiful, I can be the only person that thinks I am beautiful and I know that one person will be on my side. I am grateful to my Father in Heaven for the beauty that he has shared with me, and all around me. I am grateful for his Gift of Beauty to me.

The Gift of Strength

The gift of strength has been on my side this week and I am so grateful for that. A while ago Sio and I were talking about whether we should start a relationship or just be friends. We both took time to think seriously about what we should do. The last time I saw Sio was before I left for West Valley for Christmas, I was hoping to see him after I came back, I never did. He was acting a little strange to me, I gave him his space, on Wednesday I told him I was going to be down in St. George going to the Temple. I didn't get a reply or anything from him that whole day. I drove to St. George and went into the Temple with a prayer in mind and in my heart, I wanted to know what I was supposed to do with and about Sio. Thursday night I received the answer I needed to know. My answer was that Sio and I are to be and will be JUST friends. I took this answer well and I continued on with myself. The week went on and on Sunday Sio texted me and we had a really good long conversation and then he asked me what our relationship status was. My stomach dropped, I knew what I needed to say and I had a feeling I knew what he was going to say. I was honest and I told him that we are friends with feelings for each other, I asked him the same question, he told me that he thought deeply and very hard and felt that we are better off being just friends. This is where my gift of strength comes into play, Sunday evening I called my dad crying after texting Sio. I told him that I know that it is the right thing to do and it feels good that we are just friends, but I didn't feel at ease. I told my dad that I really liked the way that I felt around Sio and that was the hardest thing of letting our relationship be a "just friends" relationship. Of course my dad knew all the right things to say and gave me the strength to let it go and continue on. The past week with going to school, seeing boys, meeting new people, and just being social has been difficult. I have had a bad attitude towards my roommates and I have felt down. I realized that I have the strength of moving on, I want to curl up and cry because it is over, but I am smiling because it happened. Sio has given me the strength to realize that I want to change and be a better Emily, he made me laugh and smile, and he is truely a good friend. I know that he is happy and that in his future he will be happy and that gives me the strength for looking into the future and being happy. I am getting a little bit stronger everyday! Little by little, chug by chug, step by step. I know that one day a Prince will come and rescue me from this world of singles, when that day comes I will be strong enough to love and cherish him. I have the strength to wait and I am thanking my Heavenly Father everyday for his gift of strength.

New year, new me!

Yesterday I was determined I was going to do something with the mane on my head. I drove to Great Cips with ideas in mind, when I sat in the chair the girl asked me what I wanted to do. I shared my ideas and she helped me decide what to do. She told me if I were to cut 10 inches off and donate my hair I would get a free haircut. I couldn't pass up the offer so I cut 10 inches off. At first I was not too sure about what I had just done. I came back home, showered, styled my hair and I fell in love! I realized that someone needs my hair more than I do. Yesterday I realized the gift of service, I am so happy that I can help someone in their time of need.

BEFORE--

10 INCHES--

AFTER--

A Sweetness is in the Air!

What you've all been waiting for.. Yes, I did see Sio on Wednesday! He traveled up from St. George and picked me up at 6:00 p.m, took me to the Pizza Factory, after we picked up Transformers 3, came back to my place and watch it. I am not going to lie, I really like Sio! As I think about it and him, I get this weird feeling that I should like him as much as I do. Most times I try my best to ignore that feeling. I enjoy spending time with Sio, it is so easy to talk to him and just be myself. I've had a couple dreams about Sio, I don't think they are telling me something.. At least I hope they're not telling me something.
Thursday morning I woke up early, got ready to go to Grandma Twitchell's house, made a trip to Wal-mart, and then left. When I made it to Grandma's, my parents just barely got there, and my sisters were already there. I was soo happy to see them all! Thanksgiving dinner was delicious! I wish it was Thanksgiving everyday, then I would be able to eat a little healthier. After dinner Angie, our cousin Stacey, and myself went for a walk around the block, this dog would not stop following us. We met up with our Mama Sharen and Aunt Rachel, and continued walking. Rachel kept asking many question about Sio and how I met him. It was fun because I got to talk about Sio and not have anyone think I was obsessed with him.
My family and I went to our home in West Valley, the drive was long but worth it. The rest of the weekend was great! I love spending time with my family and just being in their presence. I am so blessed to have the family that I have. I do not know where I would be without them and their encouragement. I am so excited to go home for Christmas and spend some time with them. It will only be three days but its better than no days.
On Sunday I came home and this whole week has been a joke, it's been a rough week. Today is the shining day of the week. I had a great day at work, and Sio comes home from Hawaii tonight. On Wednesday I made a plan to go down to St. George and have a triple date with Steve and Maryna, Sara and Riley, and Sio and I. It was all planned and ready but Sio found out he wouldn't be in St. George until late tonight. I then canceled my going to St. George. Sio as of right now, as we speak, on the plane coming home! I am sooo excited to see him! He is planning on coming up to Cedar on Sunday, I am going to make dinner and have people over. After dinner that plan is to go to the First Presidency's Christmas Devotional for our fireside. I can't tell you how happy I am to see him, I am not his girlfriend but I really like him and missed him!
I am so thankful for the hard week I've had, it will pay off sooner or later and will be a gift when it does. Today, after a long hard week, is truly a gift.

Two Weeks and A time of Thanks! :)

Saturday November 5th Maryna and I took a trip to St. George where we were going to meet up with Steve and his Step Brother Courtney. We didn't meet up with them in St. George because they were being slow and we wanted to come back to Cedar. Later Steve, Courtney, and Sio met up with us here in Cedar. We had a pretty great night. On Sunday we all went to church and after Maryna and I went to Steve's house for lunch. We stayed there for a little bit and watched a movie and just relaxed, the three boys were falling asleep so we decided that it was time to go. When we got home I made cookies for our dinner plans that we made. We planned to go to the fireside and after we would make the boys dinner and just hang out. I don't really remember what the fireside was about, yes I know I should have paid better attention. After the fireside the boys came over and we made Spaghetti with Garlic Bread, Maryna and I are pretty good cooks. :) We played a couple games and then I cleaned up, while I was cleaning up Maryna asked me if I wanted to go for a stroll. I said yes! We left for our stroll and it was only Steve, Maryna, Sio, and myself. I remember that it was just a bit chilly and that it had just gotten done snowing. As we were on our stroll Steve told me and Sio to "come here," little did we know that we were under a tree and that Steve was going to pull the brach down. Ha ha ha Sio looked cute with the pile of snow on his head and his nose, a Kodak moment without the Kodak.
Tuesday November 8th Steve, Maryna and I went to the SUU Men's basketball game.. We won! It was fun, I love going to sporting events. That is where fun is! :) Wednesday November 9th Maryna, Steve, and I went down to St. George. Sio's brother just got home from his mission and Steve wanted to go and welcome him home. We made our way down there and we met up with Sio's brother and talked with him and Sio for a little bit. After we went back to Steve's parents home, ate and talked around a fire. Later Sio and Courtney joined us, a little bit after they joined us we went in and watched a movie. Courtney didn't join us because he had home work he wanted to get done, it was just Steve, Maryna, Sio, and me again.. Of course Steve and Maryna sat next to each other which left me and Sio sitting next to each other. I am not complaining at all.. I will be completely honest, I have no idea what movie we were watching or what even happened in the movie. Sio and I were talking through out the whole movie. Did I mention before that I had and still have feelings for Sio? Well, I think I should mention that. We had been talking for a while and we hung out a couple times before... Sio left and soon after we left to come back to Cedar.
Friday November 11th Maryna and I made our way up to Salt Lake. I spent the weekend with my family and I enjoyed it very much! I went to a good friends mission farewell, I am so proud of him for making the choice to go on a mission. I know that he will be a great missionary. On Sunday November 13th Maryna and I made our way back down to Cedar. On Monday November 14 I called Great Clips to let them know that I have my license, I am still waiting to hear back from them. On Tuesday November 15th I went to Iinstitute, lets just say that I love Institute and I love the lessons that I learn from going. On Wednesday the 16th I woke up feeling so sick. Every time I stood up I would feel like throwing up and my throat hurt. I got ready for work and when I got there I came right back home. I got into bed at 10:30 a.m woke up and 12:30 p.m warmed up Chicken Noodle Soup, ate maybe a little more than half, got back into bed at 1:00 p.m and woke up again at 5:00 p.m. I slept all day, after sleeping all day I felt a little better. Thursday the 17th my boss told me to stay home and get some rest, so I stayed home and rested up. I got one of my homework assignments done.
Friday November 18th, yesterday, I went to work and came home. I got ready to go out for ice cream with a boy named Dillan, in my Institute class. I had a good time eating ice cream and talking with him. He is a good kid, an attractive kid, and a kid I might possibly like. When I got home my roommates and I went bowling 80's style. We had so much fun! We needed a night like last night. After bowling Maryna, Rachel and I went to Applebee's and met up with some boys from our ward. At Applebee's we also had a good time. Today, Saturday November 19th, I have not done anything really. I have been a "Lazy Bum on the Log." Ha ha quote the movie... I have been lazy and I have to go to work at 4:00. I hope it is slow so I can come home and be lazy some more. Being sick just takes it out of ya. I am so excited for the rest of the weekend's/ week's plans. Sunday- Go to my own ward, and go to Sio's ward. Monday- I have the day off. Tuesday- Work and going to Institute. Wednesday- Work and hopefully see Sio. Thursday- Maybe see Sio again, going to Grandma Twitchell's house for Thanksgiving, and NO WORK! Friday- Spend time with family. Saturday- More time with family. Sunday- Come home. It is going to be great! I am looking forward to enjoying the rest of the weekend and the start of a new week full of Thanks, and Family! May we all remember at this time of Thanks that we are so blessed. I know that I have been given so much and I am so grateful. This Thanksgiving is a tremendous gift, a gift to have family together and enjoy their company. :D

Oh, the wonderful gifts.

Where do I begin? Tuesday November 1st I went to Institute and I my friend Dillan gave me his number, we are possibly going to go mudding. I am very excited, that's where some fun will be. I love going to Institute, the lessons are wonderful, that itself is a gift.
Wednesday night Keith invited me over to his house to watch a movie, What Happens in Vegas is such a cute movie. I enjoyed it! Keith and I cuddled, I don't think that we will be watching a movie again. Not sitting next to each other that is. He is a really nice guy, but being alone with him set it all. After I came home and Maryna and I went and got food, ah! It was delicious but way too late to be eating the food we got.
Thursday was a pretty boring night, I stayed  home and didn't do much. It's nice sometimes to just sit and relax.
Friday night, last night, THE BEST all week!! After I got off of work I was feeling a movie night, so I texted Trevor and asked him if he and Riley would want to come over and watch a movie, he wasn't able to so I then planned on it being just me and my roommates. We went to Redbox rented Red Riding Hood, and Rio, after we went to Wendy's, mmm, I love me some Apple Pecan Chicken Salad. We came back and I started eating, my phone started to ring and it was Alex Wall,our Resident Assistant. She was wondering if I wanted to go to the basketball game, I asked her who all is going and I was pleased with her answer. Gentry, Seth, Matt and other people. I heard Seth and I said "Let me finish eating and get some makeup on." I went only to see Seth, well I saw him, just as I remember, VERY good looking! While we were at the game Alex leaned over to me and told me that I should talk to him. I didn't know what to say to him so I kept to myself. A few minutes later Seth came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go get some food with him. I said sure, so we went out and he bought me water and M&M's. It was nice to talk with him alone for the maybe five minutes we were alone. When we went back in I sat next to him, I really like him. While sitting next to him we made small talk, and then I had to go. =| Maryna told me that Riley was coming over to talk to me because he thinks I am cute. Here we go again, she is trying to set me up with a boy that she rejected. Well I really don't like Riley like that and I don't have a desire to either, yes I know, I am rude. I left the game and came back, I had a brilliant idea that I would invite Seth over to watch a movie, but the plan was ruined when there was a party going on. I thought we would go to that, well we did and now I am kicking myself. Oh well, things happen for a reason, right? Right... I am waiting for something to happen, big or little, maybe even a sign, but I think I am waiting for something that is never going to happen. These are the gifts that I am blessed with, meeting guys and getting closer to the eternal companion that one day I will find. These little gifts are preparing me for the future, for MY future. One day, one of these boys that is a gift will work out...

Halloween Fun!

Well! You guessed it, it's that time again and there is a new boy. :) On Friday my roommates and I went to our Stake Halloween party. Sara and Maryna stayed for the food and then left. Rachel and I stayed for it all. I had so much FUN!! I started the day off with going to work, we had a party! I made a chocolate chip pie for that and it was so delicious! After work I came home to do homework and then I got ready for the party. My costume is very simple and easy, but I still needed to look good. After we all went and had some food, after the food we walked around and looked at the trunks that were decorated for Halloween. Then there was the costume contest. I didn't participate in that, my costume is too simple so I wouldn't have won. Ha ha ha, it was fun to see all the interesting ideas that people came up with. Then the dance started! This was the best part of the night, well sort of. Rachel and I started dancing the night away. As people were coming and going I saw this guy dressed in all green with leaves, I thought he was supposed to  be poison ivy, but he explained it to me and he was not poison ivy. As he at one point walked passed me I randomly asked him what his costume was and he then told me. His roommate was Edward Scissor Hands and he was Edward's bush. Ha ha I felt funny thinking he was posion ivy when he was a bush to be cut. We then introduced our selves, stood there chit chatting and he told me that he and his roommates like to party and that sometime we should join them, so I gave him my number and we parted. Rachel and I continued dancing the night away. I danced with a boy named James, James, and another boy, but I don't remember his name. Towards the end of the dance I got a text from a number I didn't know. This random number asked me if I went to the Howl, SUU's Halloween dance. I replied to this number and told them I did not go and asked who this person was. I got a reply and it was Keith "the bush." He asked Rachel and I if we wanted to watch a movie with him and his roommates. Of course I said yes! Rachel and I hurried home, changed, and then left to go watch a movie. We got to Keith's house and I saw a dog in the window, I get nervouse about dogs sometimes, we walked in the door and his dog, Remmy, walked right up to me and was just so friendly! Another dog walked up to us and it was a puppy, Maverik, he was almost as cute and my sister's puppy. We made our way to the couch, sat and just started getting to know them a little better. The movie that we watched was I am Legend. I hadn't seen it before, it was a good movie, but it was a little odd, I thought. During the movie my new friend Keith pulled out his phone, I was totally cool with it. Little did I know, he was texting me. He told me that I should sit by him. I felt really bad after we left because I didn't look at my phone until I got home. Awh! I would have loved to sit next to him. When we first got there I was really hot, but towards the end of the movie I was freezing cold and clenching a pillow trying to keep warm. He then told us that there were blankets on the couch for us, if we were cold. I couldn't resist, I was freezing! He laughed at me. After the movie Rachel and I came home, I read Keith's text and I told him that next time for sure I was going to sit by him, and maybe he would keep me warm and not the pillow. I think about it now and I feel so stupid for saying that, but oh well. It is done and over with.
On Saturday I didn't really do anything fun, I slept in, went shopping, watched a movie, and then went to work. Nothing too big. As an apartment we decided to have a party on Sunday night for Halloween.
Sunday came and I made Chocolate Chip Pie, and Caramel. I made the caramel just a little too early, but it was so so so DELICIOUS!! We were supposed to dip apples into the caramel, but we ended up just dipping cut up apples into the caramel. Lucky me, I sliced my thumb trying to cut up apples. It was very interesting and I figured it would happen sooner or later. We had a lot of people over, it was more fun that way. We had Maryna, Steve, Sara, Rachel, T.J, Melissa, Alex, Gentry, Matt, Jared, and myself. I invited Keith but he couldn 't come... Oh well, next time for sure! Even without Keith we had quite the crowd, a great crowd. I had a great time!
Yesterday for Halloween my work celebrated, and when I say celebrated I don't say that lightly. A while ago I asked Josh if he would like to go with me to the party, he said yes. I told him that we were going to be Cowboy and Cowgirl, it worked out really well, I think. At the party we ate and danced it up. I had a really good time, I hope Josh did as well. My feelings for Josh have kind of dwindled, I started liking Keith, and now I kind of like this kid named Trevor. Last night after my work party Maryna invited her friend Riley and his roommate Trevor over. Well you guessed it, she wanted me to flirt it up with Riley but again, I went for the roommate Trevor. I had invited Keith over thinking that he wouldn't come, as I was chitting it up with Trevor, Keith called me and told me he was here. SUPRISE! I walked in our house with Keith and Trevors face was just a little hard to look at, I felt really bad. I think I blew it with Trevor, I told Maryna to ask Riley for me, for Trevor's number. We will see what happens. Halloween was good this year, it has come and it has gone, good times and some bad times. There are so many things going through my mind right now that I just want to fall asleep again. I know that this is a gift in one way or another, even though I don't see it right now, maybe in due time I will find the gift in it all.

Stake Halloween Party--

Chocolate Chip Pie and Caramel--

Josh and I for the work party--